Devil in Disguise
by thespectatorion
Summary: LxLight. The newest addition to the shinigami world finds that his memories haven't been wiped as planned. Why is Yagami Light the only name he remembers? Spoilers for L's real name
1. Prologue

AN: If knowing L's real name is a spoiler to anyone. D:

Whatever, read the fic. :D

* * *

"Lawliet, wake up. Open your eyes."

Lawliet did as he was told, a first, he decided, and also a last.

When he opened his eyes, he was surrounded by hundreds of thousands of the same creature, all identical. They had the same large protruding eyes, same yellowing skin falling off in places, like they were all dead. They were all basically humanoid in shape, too, but skinny, and Lawliet could see bones sticking out. He shuddered when some of them seemed to look him in the eye. Tired, dead eyes. Bloodshot. He looked at the rest of them to avoid this.

They wore the same white plain outfit, ripped in places- all the same places, on each one. Just a shirt and pants. The collar-length hair was half-white, half-black, with no rhyme or reason, just streaks of both colors, and it stuck out. The feet were bare, chains wrapped around the ankles particularly, along with the wrists. Some around the waist, too. Wings stuck out from their backs, spiky, feathery, angelic white (with a few black feathers here and there) wings at odds with the rest of their bodies. A little black book lay at the side of each one, with a little pen. Lawliet recognized the book, of course, it was the weapon that had killed him.

But if they were going to use it on him, they hadn't before. So he felt rather safe, despite the terrifying things surrounding him. But the creatures looked bored.

Lawliet scratched one leg with his own bare foot, trying to figure out what, exactly, was going on. The creatures mimicked him, and he suddenly realized this was a room of mirrors.

The creatures were _him_.

He yelled and fell backwards. The creatures all did the same thing, and Lawliet was never going to forget the look of terror on his own face.

And that was then, the mirrors all shattered, and Lawliet lost all consciousness.

* * *

He opened his eyes again. The mirrors were gone, but the book remained. He clutched it, flipping through the blank pages.

"Knew you were gonna be a shinigami," said the nearest creature. It seemed to be smiling at him, with sharp, yellowing teeth. "You had that sensibility. That I-don't-give-a-damn attitude."

"That's what I am?" Lawliet asked. "I'm a... shinigami?"

"Yep. The name's Ryuuk, by the way. See?" Ryuuk gestured to above his head.

Oh. Lawliet realized he saw Ryuuk's name written there.

"...Oh. My name is Lawliet."

"I know."

There didn't seem to be much else to say. Lawliet felt... odd. He couldn't remember anything before waking up. He just knew he had a name, and that he'd died by the Deathnote. He knew... sort of what he'd looked like before. But what was before? Ryuuk had mentioned the before, he realized. _"You had..." _He was all set to ask Ryuuk about it, but Ryuuk spoke first.

"Everyone who dies at the hands of a Deathnote becomes a shinigami."

"Did Light become a shinigami?"

The words were out of his new mouth before he realized it was nonsense. Light? Who was Light?

Ryuuky made a face.

"Eh, maybe. He might've. I don't know yet. It's tricky. Deathnote users have a different fate than those who die at the hands of a Deathnote. See, their fate has to be _decided_. By the Gods. Most of them go to Mu. Nothingness. There haven't been that many in history, anyway." Ryuuk made a face. "I'm surprised you remember him, actually. You shouldn't. Guess they didn't do such a good job wiping your memories. They've been getting real lax about that lately, what with all the new shinigami and all. Sometimes the stronger memories stick. What else do you remember?"

"Nothing, actually."

Ryuuk cackled.

"Good. Anyway, since I'm the shinigami that owns the Deathnote that killed you... now, anyway, it used to belong to Rem, I'm the one who gives you the rules. Here ya go. Keep this with you at all times. And now, Lawliet, I have stuff to do. So I'm off. Bye." Ryuuk handed him a scroll, and flew off.

Lawliet did not like this place. He did not like not knowing, and he did not know anything in this place.

He decided to start with the one thing he did know, and that was if he didn't go over to a hole in the ground and find a few humans to kill, he was going to die soon.

* * *

AN:

Okey-dokey, I should not be starting a new multi-chapter fic but gah, silly plot bunnies attacked me. Plus, I wanted to imagine L as a shinigami. xD But I made him too pretty. D: Oh, well. He wouldn't be one of those shinigami that look like lumps, anyway.


	2. Judgement

I suppose I should be more descriptive... I don't know. I prefer to read stories with a great deal of dialogue, and I can't stand looking at huge paragraphs where people spend ages describing someone's hair, or whatever. XD I put too much thought into the way my story looks on the page, and not enough thought into the words.

But I don't know. Does the way the story looks matter to anyone else? Like, if you look at a story and the entire thing is one giant block of text, will you be able to concentrate on it? Or just tons and tons of even, giant paragraph blocks? I find I can't concentrate. D: It's like, ugh, I don't want to read all of that. (Though sometimes I'll manage, if the author is that incredible. But I'm not going to presume that I'm so great that I can ask you to do that.)

* * *

"Heaven's looking for more recruits. They want the new shinigami," the King of the Shinigami informed the Judge. "Hell wants the Death Note users. They both messaged me yesterday."

They walked among the realm of the shinigami, unseen to everyone but each other. The Judge was here to observe, and there were only two shinigami in the entire realm that could see and speak to her. One was the King, a useless but generally well-meaning shinigami, qualities which had resulted in him being given the job as second in charge of the shinigami.

The other was Ryuuk.

"Fools. I'm not letting any Death Note users go to Hades' realm. They're going to Mu and that's it."

The King scratched his exposed skull.

"How come you never give me any Death Note users?"

"Listen, you've heard of Yagami Light, haven't you?"

He nodded. She walked through a older shinigami, who shivered when her bare foot passed through him, but nothing more. Her white robes dragged on the dusty gray ground behind her, but neither those nor her feet got dirty, and she left no footprints behind where she walked.

She didn't make contact with this place, and it didn't make contact with her. There was something special about the King and about Ryuuk, that they could see her and speak with her, but she never could figure out what it was.

"The Death Note users usually become similar to him- oh, none quite so bad, but still... That disregard for life? I don't want those people among your shinigami. I absolutely refuse. I didn't want the shinigami in the first place, they're bad enough about it anyway. But... Hades insisted, as did... well, y'know." She pointed up, even though Heaven was to the right of the shinigami kingdom. The King understood anyway.

"So what do you think?"

"Oh, I don't care about the shinigami. Your numbers exploded over the Kira episode, and frankly if people can get into Heaven, they probably should. But give the Death Note users to Hades? Heck no. Heaven's a bunch of peace-loving wimps who think the best of everyone. They wouldn't fight back until it was too late..." She sighed. "No, the only thing that keeps Hades in line is this place, and the fact that we are so much more powerful than they are. If I gave him the Death Note users, though, it would be like handing him a weapon. Like I said before, most of the Death Note users? They just don't care."

The King nodded slowly.

"Some of them could become shinigami... but the Light boy? It's Mu for him, no matter what. And not after just a little bit of punishment. Nope. We're not giving him to Heaven."

"I think Mu is punishment enough. Isn't it normally?"

"Is Yagami Light normal? Even for a Death Note user?"

"Well, no," the King agreed.

The Judge shook her head. "If we stick him in Mu the way that he is, it wouldn't matter. He'd stay the same, never regretting his actions. I've never seen another Death Note user like him. Most of them, you put them by themselves for a while, and they go crazy. They figure it out and then they can't stand themselves anymore, and Mu is the worst punishment. But him, he'd forever believe himself a God. He's that convinced. And for him, he wouldn't care if he was by himself. That's not a punishment. He spends eternity as God in his head."

The King sighed.

"You're going to do something about that, then?"

She nodded.

"You can make him change?"

"Yeah, I think so. I can't have people believe themselves gods. Bad things happen." She shrugged. "Even in Mu, I don't want to take that chance... I'll have to talk to him, of course, and find out what best will... humble him."

The King nodded.

"Don't make him a shinigami, please."

She nodded.

"Of course not. Never. Death Note users- there's never been one that I'd put another Death Note in their hands. It's _possible_, but hasn't ever happened."

"Will you give any of my shinigami to Heaven?"

She frowned, thinking.

"Perhaps. Wouldn't you like to get rid of Ryuuk?" She laughed. "But I've never looked at his life, which is the important part. I can't imagine that he would have gone to Heaven anyway. I don't know. I really don't want to send anyone to Hell, though. Being killed by the Death Note is different from dying. Those who die before their time- maybe they would have redeemed themselves in their last days. Then again, maybe those who would have gone to Heaven would have destroyed their chances."

"Sounds like a tough choice..." the King mumbled.

"It is, it is... King, I'd better go. I made plans to talk to Yagami Light today. Get it over with, y'know." She smiled at him. "So I'll see you later. Take care."

"Bye."

She kicked open the ground, to a door to her offices, and descended through the staircase that appeared.

* * *

Lawliet watched the people go by below him, spending his days sitting on the dry, dusty ground of the shinigami realm in front of a hole in the ground. The world spun below him and he watched time pass, watched the clocks on the walls spin and the people going about their daily lives. Occasionally, he would break from his habitual position- nothing felt quite as... _right _as crouching on the ground, hunched over, with his wings around his shoulders and his arms around his knees, hiding from everyone and everything- to reach over, pick up his pencil and scrawl a name in his Deathnote.

His memories fading, he found it easier and easier every day to scrawl a name or two. It was, after all, how he would stay alive.

Occasionally, names and faces jumped out at him. Acquaintances? Friends? Enemies? He even wondered if he'd been in love with some of them at one point. A girl named Misa Amane caught his eye. Another person, a man named Toushiro Matsuda made him automatically think _Idiot_, and smile. But he didn't know _why_. It gnawed at him. He watched them closer.

He found that as the days passed, he wrote down names less and less and watched the people more and more. On the morning of the day that Amane Misa killed herself, a soft thud next to Lawliet indicated that a shinigami had just landed next to him. He didn't look up. If the shinigami was going to watch, then the shinigami was going to watch. It was none of Lawliet's business.

"Ah," said Ryuuk, startling Lawliet. "Never thought she'd go for suicide." They watched Misa prepare to die.

"You know her?" asked Lawliet. He watched Misa cry and begin to write a note, a love letter to Yagami Light. It was that name that had caught Lawliet's eye in the first place. "She seems familiar, but I can't remember why."

Ryuuk shrugged. "Yeah, I guess. You knew her. She's the reason two shinigami I knew died. Cute, huh? But please don't extend her life just for that. You'll die, just like they did."

Lawliet shrugged. "I'm not planning on it. But sorry about your friends."

"Not my friends. Just shinigami I knew."

"Okay."

Misa drove the dagger through her chest, red slowly staining the front of her all-white outfit. A few moments later, the counter above her head fell to zero.

Lawliet wondered how much more this would have mattered if he could remember who she was.

"Killed herself because she couldn't stand to miss Light Yagami anymore," Lawliet murmured. "A man named Toushiro Matsuda mentioned his name yesterday, too."

Ryuuk laughed.

"You know what they don't let you remember life?"

Lawliet didn't trust Ryuuk, but he was all that Lawliet had.

"No. But I don't remember. All I have is the name _Yagami Light_."

Ryuuk grinned wider. "I guessed as much. Anyway. They- the shinigami- they go insane missing it. They can't kill. They die. Same thing goes for the shinigami who remember only a little bit. Only it's different. They spend all their time watching, looking for clues."

Lawliet didn't respond.

"So, Lawliet, how many people have you killed?"

"Enough to live for several hundred more years."

"Well, you're a little bit cold."

"You're not exactly warm and fluffy yourself."

Ryuuk chuckled. The expression on his face was worrisome for Lawliet. He smiled with all of his teeth showing.

"I don't remember anything. But actually, I didn't come here to discuss myself, as fun a topic as that is. I have a question for you. Are you looking to find Yagami Light?"

"Why do you ask?"

"No fair. I asked first."

"I'll answer if you promise to answer my question."

"I make no promises."

"Then I'm afraid you won't get an answer."

"S'okay, I know you're looking for him."

"Are you going to help?"

Ryuuk made a thinking face, frowning and staring up at the bleak gray sky. "I'm going to stick around to watch."

"That's not very helpful."

"No, it's not."

"So why do I want you around?"

"Did I say you needed to?"

Ryuuk _wanted _to annoy him. Ryuuk _wanted _to be there to rile him up.

"I suppose not. But I don't like having you around. I don't like you, Ryuuk."

"What a shame..."

Ryuuk didn't move.

"Why don't you leave?"

"Because I don't want to leave."

Lawliet was confused. Ryuuk should want to leave. Lawliet didn't like him, had explicitly said so. So why was he staying?

He opened his mouth to ask but Ryuuk beat him to it.

"I don't care if you don't like me. The rest of these shinigami- they're simple. They don't care about anything but staying alive. They're not very fun, or interesting. Humans, though, are a interesting bunch. And you are more human than any shinigami ever ought to be. So I'm going to stay with you, because you're more likely to do something interesting than any of these other idiots. Apple?"

Ryuuk held one out to him. Lawliet had seen the apples in the shinigami realm before. They looked gross. He'd seen one on Earth, and it was very round and shiny.

"I don't like apples."

Ryuuk looked horrified.

"Someday, I will teach you about the joys of apples from the human realm."

"Well, those don't look so bad."

"Yeah, ours are kind of gross."

Lawliet didn't feel like continuing the conversation, so he just stared at a man named Aizawa for a few minutes. Ryuuk munched on apples, and Lawliet almost thought it was nice to not be alone anymore.

* * *

Ryuuk snored.

Shinigami didn't need to sleep, and Lawliet never liked to, but Ryuuk did. It was annoying. Maybe he was better off alone.

_Maybe I should just leave without him._

He stood up, stretching out his wings, and took off.

Ryuuk was right about one thing, anyway. The shinigami world was boring to look at.

"Hey!" Lawliet heard the steady beating of wings, and recognized the voice, cringing.

"If you wanted to follow me, you shouldn't be so lazy about it," he called back to Ryuuk.

"How are you going to find Light by searching Earth?" Ryuuk asked him suddenly. "He's dead."

"What am I supposed to do? There must be records of him somewhere. I don't know anything about myself, but I bet if I find records of that name, I'll find records of mine, too."

"Nope. No records of Yagami Light."

"What?"

"He wiped all records of himself after you died. So that no one could connect you to him, of course."

"Trace him...? Why would they- Ah. Was he my murderer? Did I know this?"

"Maybe." Ryuuk shrugged.

* * *

The woman across from him leaned back in her chair.

She was pretty. Even though she was sitting he could tell that she was tall, with white-blonde tightly curled hair down to the middle of her back, and wide green eyes. She dressed in ancient-looking white robes, reminding him of pictures of Greek goddesses, and while she looked no older than 25 he guessed that she was much older than anyone he had ever met before.

She didn't fit the room they were in. It was dark but spacious, with fourteen sides. Each door- no, all the doors but one had a number, and the numbering was odd. He counted it off in his head. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 12+.

"Yagami Light," she said carefully. Light didn't like her voice. It wasn't... unpleasant... but it did have a certain piercing quality to it. He'd never heard someone whose mere _words _had power before, not like this.

Light smiled at her. "Hello."

"You can't charm me or threaten me," she said, sounding bored, but every word still hit him. Light dropped the polite act. He wasn't going to mess with this woman.

"Where the hell am I? Who're you?"

"Good! True colors. I like that. Now, I am the Judge."

He smiled at her again. "That's funny, I'm justice."

She ignored him.

"Tell me about yourself."

The request seemed simple enough, but Light knew there was more to it.

"I was one of the top students in my nation when I graduated from high school... I was bored, though. I worked with my father, a police chief, on the Kira cases... The great detective L was one of my friends..."

He didn't think there was any chance that she didn't know about the Kira case, and that it wasn't the reason he was here.

"And- tell me about the Kira case. What role did you play?"

She gazed at him, smiling in a pleasant, polite way.

No chance at all.

"I was Kira."

"...And?"

"I beat L." He smirked. "I was smarter- I won. And I purged the world of many evildoers before I was defeated."

"Purged the world, huh?"

"It was my dream to have a perfect world- a place where law-abiding citizens who never did anything wrong would have nothing to fear. I wanted there to be someplace where people couldn't just do bad things and get away with it."

"You killed police officers, Yagami Light. The very law-abiding citizens you wished to protect. Please explain that to me."

Light smacked the table with his hand. He felt like he'd been saying the same thing over and over again for his entire lifetime. Didn't anyone get it? Was there anyone who understood? His followers had always thought they did. But they were just sheep, just people who needed a leader.

"They were in my way. That makes them against my New World."

"I see... And you would have reigned over this New World, wouldn't you?"

He was taken aback by the question.

"Well, of course- there was no one else who could have the strength to. It would have been hard- but I would have done it."

"It would have been hard, but you would have done it," she repeated slowly. "Well. Yagami Light, I'm going to have to think about your situation for a while- lean forward a little bit?" He obeyed. "Yes, just like that, thank you."

She reached forward, stretching out her arm across the flimsy wooden table that separated them, and touched his forehead. He barely had time to register the feel of her sharp nail digging into the area between his eyebrows when everything went black.

* * *

You know, I have a very deep connection with Hinata from Naruto. Today I handed my crush a pan of brownies, and I swear I nearly fainted. -dies of embarrassment- AND HE HUGGED ME. FOR LIKE, TWO MINUTES. I THINK IT WAS JUST TO WEIRD ME OUT, WHICH IT DID. BUT I DIDN'T ASPLODE. WHICH I TOTALLY THOUGHT IT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN. But he and his girlfriend just broke up. Or rather, I get the feeling that she broke up with him. He still likes her. -sighs-

Also, please review. :)

And I've randomly become a Buffy fan. SPIKE IS LOVEEEE. AS IS XANDER. :D AND GILES. They're so hot. XD


End file.
